Giving a child up for adoption is difficult, no matter what the situation surrounding that choice may have been.  Years later, it is natural to wonder about what this child experienced with his or her new family.  You may have questions about what this adopted child looks like, or what kinds of things he or she enjoys doing.  Questions like these often lead to a search for the adopted child.  Here are a few ideas that can help you in your search.

Start by asking questions.  Interview the people that were in your life at the time your child was adopted.  Ask your parents questions.  If other family members were close to you at that time, they might remember something.  Speak with the doctor who you saw for your physical examinations while you were pregnant.  The adoption process generally involves a lawyer, so ask the lawyer questions as well.  These people can help you fill in the gaps in your memory from what must have been a very emotional time.

Ask them what they remember about the family who adopted your child.  What was the last name of the couple?  Where were they from?  Did they keep the name you gave the child, or did they change it?  What is the child’s birthday, including the year?  What hospital were you at for the delivery?  Which lawyer helped with the paperwork?  What adoption agency was involved?  These are just a few of the questions you might ask.

There are some online searches you can do if you know your adopted child’s full name.  The White Pages http://www.whitepages.com/ might be useful if your adopted child is now an adult.  If your child is female, keep in mind that she may have gotten married, and changed her last name.  There are a variety of websites offering a “People Search”, and most of those charge a fee.

You might want to ask the adoption agency or lawyers involved with the adoption to assist you in finding your adopted child.  These professionals will have the most experience in searching through official documents of this kind.  Understand that if records are sealed, there may not be much you can do.  Each state will have different laws about that.  Be prepared for the possibility that your adopted child might not have an active interest in meeting with you.  It’s heartbreaking, but you just have to accept it.